February 16, 2005

A conversation or two that I've had the past week

Did you form the impression yet that I'm what my grandmother used to call a smart aleck? Let me share with you two conversations I've had recently that amused me, at least, to no end.

Conversation 1:
Place: Walking up the train platform with a commuting buddy

Her: What was that language I heard you speaking to your children the other day? Was it French?

Me: No, it was Norwegian. We speak Norwegian to the children. We only speak French to the servants.

The look I got was priceless.

Conversation 2:
Place: Gym, this morning

Her: If you need to reach me tomorrow, I should tell you that I will be out of the office all day.

Me: What are you doing?

Her: It is my art and culture day. You know what I mean? I'm going to see Christo's installation in Central Park.

Me: Oh. Its good that you explained what you meant there because when you said culture, I assumed you meant yogurt.

Another incredulous look.

Its just sometimes, I forget to turn on the filter between my brain and my mouth. Fortunately, that doesn't happen too often, but still, it does happen.

Posted by Random Penseur at February 16, 2005 09:07 AM

Not everyone has this talent RP, please don't filter!!!!

Posted by: Wicked H at February 16, 2005 11:47 AM

We have filters? Hmm...Mine must be clogged.

Posted by: Howard at February 16, 2005 03:22 PM

so for art and culture you read 'culture' as yogurt? despite the clue of 'art and' to assist. it just sounds like a wilful seizure upon an ambiguity, and, as such, an example of your need to produce a witticism whatever the cost, with little regard for quality. evidence of a moment of desperation, yes, evidence of being a smart aleck, sadly, no.

Posted by: extreme unction at February 16, 2005 05:29 PM

Thanks for your input. The culture comment was in response to the question from my friend inquiring as to whether I understood what she meant by art and culture. I'm guessing you didn't read too carefully. The clue was there in her question to me. The smart aleck or sarcastic response I gave her was to that. I suppose you missed that. Or were you too intent on producing your own little masterpiece? Sort of intellectual one hand clapping? By the way, what do you have against capital letters?

Posted by: RP at February 16, 2005 07:31 PM

We only speak French to the servants...


Posted by: JohnL at February 16, 2005 10:33 PM

Bwahahahahahahahahahahaha!! Oh, man, that was good.
Filters sometimes get in the way of the funniest moments of our lives. That's not to say they have no place, mind you.

Posted by: Jester at February 16, 2005 11:39 PM

I had a neat willful-loss-of-filter moment a few years ago.

I was playing in a local dart league and a woman from another team had forgotten her set of darts. She was testing the weight of various players' darts to see whose set she would borrow for the night.

I was talking to someone at the time and was unaware of what she was doing. So she walks up to me and puts her hand out so's I could hand her the dart that I had in my left hand. I was a little confused.

"Bob, she wants to feel your dart," Joe told me.

Well, of course, the wheels started turning as I slowly began to hand it to her -- taking my sweet time just in case I had something snarky to say.

"Don't say it," Joe warned, shaking his head. "Take the 5th..."
All the guys were staring in silence just in case I'd come up with something.

"Okay," I said. "But, it's a hard-tip. Be careful you don't get pricked."

Everyone busted while she took the dart and mimed knifing me, Norman Bates-style, with the dart -- giggling all the while.

Filters? My best moments are when they're clogged!

Posted by: Tuning Spork at February 17, 2005 08:47 PM

TS, I guess that makes you a "sharp wit", with your "pointed" comments!

Loved the story, though!

Posted by: RP at February 18, 2005 09:22 AM

Ouch! That's just PUNishment. Maybe I'll "poke" around and take a "stab" at it. LOL!

Posted by: Tuning Spork at February 18, 2005 05:41 PM
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