December 28, 2006

Inspiration took the long way around

I was waiting and waiting for inspiration to strike. Instead, it seems to have taken the long way around and gently pinched me behind the knee. I have had a confusing couple of weeks, packed with changes, and not a lot of time to reflect on their meanings or ramifications. In no particular order:

*As of Jan. 1, I am a partner in my law firm. I have mixed emotions about this. Very mixed. It complicates things greatly.

*My mother started chemo.

*The Boy Child, yesterday, fell and cut his face from the corner of his left eye to almost the side of his face. The plastic surgeon believes it will leave a scar. I take him back tomorrow morning for another consultation. I am simply very sad.

*The Viking Bride has decided that she wants to stop working outside the home and instead devote her considerable talents and energy to caring full time for our brood. This has consumed much of my thinking. I am concerned about the finances (very real since she is particularly well thought of at her job and compensated accordingly), about the changes for my relationship with her, about the changes she may experience, about how my relationship with the children will change (will I be more of an outsider now that she is spending vastly more time with them?), and, well, just how it all would work.

*And, if she does stay home, we are kicking around the idea of her taking the kids to Norway for an extended visit (4-6 weeks) this coming summer without me. That's a long time for us all to be away from each other. And it was my idea.

*I am consumed by hope and tortured by thoughts that a certain family enterprise is going to work out such that we could afford, no sweat, to have the Viking Bride no longer contributing to the family coffers and I would no longer have to earn my bread by practicing law. These thoughts are not healthy as they depend on a million things, all outside my control, and thus verge on fantasy. Even if this fantasy flies, it ain't gonna happen before 2008. That's a long time to wait to see if a fantasy is going to come true and a lot can happen in between.

Yup, just a whole lot going on.

I cannot wait to turn the page on this year. As if the act of writing a new year on the next to do list will magically transform everything. As if.

Posted by Random Penseur at December 28, 2006 11:50 AM | TrackBack

Wow, you do have a lot going on. As someone who is up for partner in 2008, I understand your mixed feelings.

My prayers are with your mom as she goes through chemo.

As a mom, I can utterly relate to your emotions about your son's scar. That kind of thing makes me shiver.

As to the rest of your issues, yes, well, I understand.

Bring on the new year!

Posted by: Monica C. at December 28, 2006 12:14 PM

sometimes the simple act of turning over a new page on the calendar IS enough, but it's never easy.

One thing at a time, my friend. Don't complicate it. Enjoy every moment with your wonderful family. The right answers will come to you, and you'll know what you really want to do together.

Sorry to hear about the BC's cut. I hope he is taking it well and healing quickly.

Posted by: caltechgirl at December 28, 2006 05:39 PM

That's a list fraught with all kinds of worries and what-ifs.

I can say that in some ways, since I'm always there, my kids are more attached to their dad. When he comes home, he gets rock star treatment.

My son has a scar on his cheek from a dog bite. When it happened I was pretty distraught at the thought of the scar. It still bothers me, but it has faded tremendously. We kept it covered in sunscreen and rubbed Mederma on it faithfully, and I think that helped it not be worse.

I'll hope for the best with everything and wish that the new year will bring happiness despite the worries.

Posted by: Jordana at December 29, 2006 09:55 PM

I am sending my best wishes to BC for his speedy and hopefully not too painful recovery. Perhaps the Doctor is wrong and the scar will not be visible.

I am also sending continued prayers to you and your Mom and to those who are rallying along side her. These are tough roads ahead and it might be easier to simply take it moments at a time rather than one day at a time.

I am hopeful that all family ventures will work out for the best and the RP Family will be stronger for it.

Best wishes for a Healthy, Happy New Year!

Hang in there my friend.

Posted by: Wicked H at December 30, 2006 09:25 AM


Carpe annum!

Prayers and best wishes to you and your family. I hope all of you have a joyous New Year.

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